Alright, sit down and listen. Common language is now officially post-grammar. Grammar is fun and everything, but it's relevance to the average person right now is on a "know-your-cuts-of-meat" kind of level. Knowing language rules is like being able to match the McDay to the McDeal. Interesting, sometimes useful, but ultimately, honestly, pretty fucking useless. A couple years ago people were getting all freaked out about the evolutionary path of our language... Given that language naturally conforms to the rules and nature of the dominant medium in which it is used... hold on, did I lose anyone? I think i lost myself there, tripped over the thematic thread running through this paragraph - Ok we're back. ...naturally conforms to the the rules and nature of the dominant medium in which it is used, everyone was like "Whoa, the internet is going to fuck up our speech and spelling!!" Well no. Didn't happen. People aren't dropping lol's and brb's into their usualy discourse and vowels haven't been added to the endangered species list (here's some now, just to prove how abundant they are, that i can waste them like this: aeiousometimesy raaaaaape meeeeeee).

The fact is this: I understand what you're saying, even if your grammer is all fucked in the face. Yeah i know grammar inside-fucking-out... i know my grammar better than i know performance athletic apparel for fucking sakes. And I have lucid dream conversations with animated pieces of performance athletic apparel. Btw you should never start a sentence with a conjunction like that. And don't be sad, oh no don't cry dear it's not that bad. This isn't the decline of the english language. This is the way the language is going to be in today's (buzzword warning) multicultural, media-driven, marykateandashleyolsen global village. Oh dude i feel really dirty after letting those terms out into the bloggosphere. Ewwwwww typing blogosphere didn't help.

K check it here's the upside. Are you still listening? Do you have soothing music on? Might I suggest the "Lovers" album by The Sleepy Jackson? I might. Dude, this is an age of magical potential for linguistic innovation. We're talking, like, a litter of puppies being breastfed by a teenaged Pierre Berton level of magical potential. Notice how many words have been made up recently? All the fucking time new ones are appearing. The lines between parts of speech are dissolving. Try it for yourself: take your favourite noun, use it as a verb! Wasn't that fun! Use someone's name as a verb! An adverb! Whatever! Let your participles dangle! Dangle it out there for everyone to see! It's the nineties bitch! Dope homies are dropping prefixes and suffixes all over the shizzle!

What are your favorite words? Want to have fun with them? Let's have a nice chat.