Hello Toronto, let's get down.
So I think I'm dying, or I have parkinsons or one of my body, soul and mind is rejecting the two remaining elements, or I need to lay off the Indian food for a while, or some combination of the above options. I feel like complete fucking physically negative shit. The twitching... muscle spasm-ing is happening more frequently, much more frequently in the past couple days, and frankly it's starting to freak me out a little. I'm starting to notice a few factors in the twitching increasing, or in the case of this weekend, rising to a disturbing delirium tremen level at a family dinner. Lack of sleep, crazy stimulants, alcohol, withdrawl from those two, temperature change.... and maybe some psychological factors.

I know that our subconscious minds, and probably our post-conscious minds are very active in colouring our physical condition, emotions, mood, aura, interactions... pretty much everything. And outside positive and negative social and socialemotional forces have a huge fucking effect, on some people more than others. Sometimes I'm a big fucking ball of emotional osmosis. Not as much anymore as I used to be... Another one of the ways we harden as we grow up. More worldly and open yes, but also more protective of my own oil on canvas mood mural... subtle tones of fragility and wonder fill the space and drip onto the floor.

Yes, I know post-conscious isn't really a thing, in the sense of things being things, and things being what they are... It's a new term i just invented just now... so if you're not familiar, it makes sense to me, so don't worry about it, ok? And before you fucking text me about it, I already know that I throw "post" around a lot as a prefix... And yes, I understand the semantic irony implicit in "post"'s use as a prefix.

(Ha ha! Words are my friends. Streetcar, Tylenol Ultra Relief, Full-Throttle Energy Drink, Five Star 3'x5' Notebook, Words - you guys are all on my Christmas card list)

Along those lines, yes, I know socialemotional isn't really a real term either, in the sense of a term being a linguistic element, not an end-user-defined temporal unit, and end-user-defined temporal units being what they are. But I believe we communicate with our emotions as well as our words and our actions. Communication works like this. I think. Bear with me:

If the communication an action, it will be interpreted into language.
Linguistic communication is an expression of intent or emotion, in some form of one or the other, and is interpreted as such.
Emotional communication... Is something that I'm working slowly on trying to understand... But emotional communication is non-verbal, does not involve an action or a gesture, and is fucking crazy to try to comprehend, but it exists, so fuck you. Somehohw, through the powers that are present in this universe, and between all of us, emotions are transmitted and received and it sometimes we know it's happening but most of the time we don't. There are many different levels and degrees of emotional communication, but that's a whole different blog entry.
Emotional communication is interepreted, if you can, and absorb it, as pure MEANING.
And meaning is fucking cocaine for your mind/spirit/body value meal.

Alright, I had somewhere I intended on going with this entry when I started it... That clearly got lost along the way. And I'm not sure what I found instead. Anyways, the plan is to not feel like junkie shit tomorrow. So no indian food. Simple, mayonnaise-based dishes are the order of the day. And possibly pitas. Probably pitas.

Flip the switch and let the words drip, let them fall out and pool and puddle together into what ever the words themselves desire.

Please send money,
Sanchez